What does She have that I don’t have?
On the Cutting Edge of Networking
Networking: The practice of gathering contacts; the process or practice of building up or maintaining informal relationships, especially with people who could bring advantages such as career or business opportunities.
That’s how networking is defined in my dictionary. It sounds somewhat cold and distant as I read the definition. To me, good networking is friendlier, runs deeper, warmer, and is more meaningful. I like to take time to invite people into my life, share my past, present and hopes for the future, building a relationship that’s more than a flash in the pan, here one day forgotten the next. I need to know a person more than just meet, greet and here’s my card.
Have you ever observed someone at a business event or other gathering and thought you would like to meet them and get to know them better but felt anxious about going up to them and introducing yourself? Do you tell yourself things like: what would I say, or will they think I’m a dork? Many women go to luncheons, dinners, meetings and gatherings where they sit in the same room with lots of other people, smile at one another and nod, but never make the effort to introduce themselves.
My friend Diane, however, is not one of those women. Diane understands that people are flattered when she takes the time to make the initial contact by introducing herself. She eases into the introduction by giving them a compliment then starts up a conversation. For example, she may share with them that its simply their presence that attracted her or their great haircut or something they are wearing. Then she shares something about herself to break the ice. Diane also understands that most people like to talk about themselves and what they do, so she keeps the conversation focused on the person she it talking to. Before you know it the conversation is jumping like popcorn in the pan. Almost without fail during this initial contact she gleans a valuable piece of information about an upcoming event or something that is a benefit to her.
Have you ever wondered why some women seem to have everything come their way? They seem to have it all. They are friendly, have it together, look successful, act successful and are successful. Like they have an inside track. They appear to have that something extra. Well, they get that edge by reaching out and making the extra effort and by doing so they put themselves on the cutting edge of networking.
How thoughtful and impressive it is when someone you've met at a luncheon or other meeting mails you a handwritten note telling you that they enjoyed talking with you and would like to meet you again; or when an acquaintance emails you and wants to meet for coffee or lunch and would just like to get to know you better.
To me, networking is even better when there is more than a mutual benefit of a business referral. To be on the cutting edge, there should be a true caring for one another. Wanting to build genuine relationships, share the abundance of life, knowledge, friends, your favorite this or that, wanting mutual success and yes business referral opportunities are vital.
So the next time you're at a gathering and see someone you would like to meet, when that first thought comes to your mind, go ahead, take a chance, take the initiative, just walk up to her and start a conversation. If you feel apprehensive, that's OK, do it anyway. Be complimentary and talk about them, by doing so you'll make their day and yours too. And then days later, put forth that little bit extra, write a note, make the phone call, talk about your earlier meeting and invite them to coffee, Your network will grow and the benefits will multiply. When you make the effort, you might just be introducing yourself to your next best friend.